Hello beautiful people!
Let’s turn a weakness into a strength.
Some of you are saying, “Yayayayayayayayay! No more tears! No more journaling! No more working on past me in prep for better future me!” but some of y’all will choose to make tomorrow the point at which you stop showing up for yourself in as consistent a way. There will be all sorts of good reasons to put off getting serious about managing a next-tier show bible, but baby, oof… it’s awfully early to bail on your commitment to yourself. Remember: EVERY bit of what we do in these 100 days is meant to help build muscles for a lifetime of success.
So today is about turning weaknesses into strengths.
Back to labeling: We’re really good at saying things like, “I suck at math,” or, “I always get lost,” or, “I’ll never be organized,” and I want you to think back to a silly moment in an episode of Friends in which Monica found a way to be okay with giving bad massages by being the BEST bad massage-giver ever.
I want you to try this on yourself the next time you say, “I suck at math” by reversing it to, “I am the best at being sure math is hard for me.” “I always get lost” is so much cooler as, “Leave it to me and I’ll find a new route anywhere!” and, “I’ll never be organized” can easily become, “I’ve got so many badass ways of looking at my data. I can choose ANY direction from which to come at it!”
The way this one shook out really clearly for me is with my OCD. I spent many years trying to reduce my obsessive-compulsive tendencies. I probably logged two decades doing everything from medicating to meditating (and so much in between) to try and stop needing illogical and sometimes self-abusive rituals in order to feel safe.
One of the OCD rituals that has persisted despite having a way better relationship with many of those symptoms is one involving volume. When volume is measured in numbers, I must have the volume set in increments of 5. So… the TV can be set to 25 or 30 or 35… but if 35 is actually too quiet, I have to go all the way up to 40 (even though that’s too loud). Because 36, 37, 38, and 39 are unsafe numbers when it comes to volume.
I know. OCD is fun.
Okay, so here I have this crazy bizarre thing with numbers when it comes to volume… and I have this insanely overflowing inbox of email. Now, I don’t have the same numbers issue with my inbox, but when I choose to USE my “weakness” as a strength here, I actually can get more messages answered, deleted, or archived.
New rule: Once I open my inbox, I can’t leave it ’til what’s left in the inbox is an increment of 5.
Suddenly, I stayed on top of things I had previously put off because I used a lifelong “weakness” for the strength it actually is. The absoluteness of the full-on requirement that these numbers surround me in one realm (measurement of volume) became ways to support behaviors I wanted to improve (overflowing inbox management). I gamified my life with this silly-yet-essential-to-my-belief-that-everything-will-be-okay OCD thing I had previously tried to eradicate.
And it’s not just my inbox that can benefit from this shift. Anything that can be measured in numbers, I can choose to change my relationship with, so that things I had avoided miraculously got done. So that things I said would never be a certain way in my life amazingly became exactly that desired way.
Through using a “weakness” to help.
Need to hang up clean clothes? 5 items have to be hung up. Need to follow up with potential collaborators I met at a networking event? 5 of them have to be followed on social media or emailed before that task is done.
See the fact that you have a strong muscle for something unwanted (y’know, that thing you label a “weakness”) as proof that you CAN build strong muscles. All muscles. Next, start using those already-strong-muscles to support areas you want to build up.
Disengagement from someone else’s drama becomes laser focus on a task. Bossiness becomes leadership. Laziness becomes relaxed centeredness. Conflict-avoidance becomes diplomacy. Scatteredness becomes the ability to see things from all perspectives.
And once you’ve moved on from the direct “flip” of the weakness, you can find ways to use your previously-labeled weakness to support unrelated goals. Rob Lowe, for example, maintains his sobriety through his previously-labeled-as-untenable competitiveness. He heard the statistic about how many graduates of the treatment facility from which he was graduating would relapse and decided then and there on graduation day that his competitive spirit would be what drove him to beat those odds. And every moment he feels weak about sobriety, he reminds himself that he is strong about winning, and another moment of sobriety is in the bank.
Mission. Accomplished.
Today’s work: Make a list of what you’ve got no problem doing. What’s easy. Where you’re strong (but you may have labeled that strength a weakness until now). When our upcoming (and ongoing) show bible work gets tough, you’ll come back to this list to soldier through to the next tier.
Tweet it out: Turning weaknesses into strengths today and daily as I #GetInGear with @BonnieGillespie and #SMFAninjas. #NextTier, baby!
Looking forward to your comments on this, lovely.
’til tomorrow… stay ninja!
